I was having a hard time deciphering what I was supposed to be doing and when I was supposed to be doing it.  There was no employee guidelines or by-laws.  And to top it off, I haven’t even delved into the breastfeeding pandemonium.  For someone who has never changed a diaper up until she had her first baby, breastfeeding was as far from my thought process as flying to the moon.  But this is what I learned – I am trying to think of a way I can describe breastfeeding so even a man could understand it.  Let’s see . . . picture this – someone sucking on your nipples eight times a day until they bleed and the pain is so bad your toes curl.  That is the extent of breastfeeding for the first ten days.  Ten days was always my magic number.  If you can make it through the first ten days, breastfeeding is the most convenient, economical, and healthy means to feed your baby.  By day ten the nipples have toughened up and the pain is gone.  But, since this was my first baby I didn’t know it would get better in a few days.  If I had a time line or some sort of schedule it may have helped but the not knowing how long I was going to be sleep deprived and in pain was worse than the actual sleep deprivation and discomfort.  I just wanted to feel human again.