I started dating Derek in February 1992 when he was the restricted earnings coach (that is what they called it back then, now it is called Director of Basketball Operations) at St. Louis University and by April 1992 he lost that coaching job. I should have seen the red flags and starting running for the door. We had only been dating 2 months, no one would have gotten hurt – no harm, no foul. You will see basketball analogies throughout my blog. When your entire life revolves around basketball, the analogies are just bound to come to the forefront. For instance, if someone has to poop in our house they don’t have to use the restroom instead they have to “post up”. If someone is getting a little too rowdy they get a “30 second time out” or a “TV timeout”. And, we don’t have family meetings; we have “chalk talk.” I guess it is the price you pay for being married to a coach.
Love is blind and after ignoring all the red flags of what life would be like being married to a coach it becomes official. On June 1st 1996, I married my coach. I should have known by the ceremony that from here on out college basketball would take precedence over every aspect of my life. First, the date of the wedding could not take place during the preseason, season, post season, signing period or camp week. Second, once you become involved with a coach, the entire athletic department becomes your family and you become intertwined in some way or another. So, it was to no surprise when my best friend’s fiancé, who happened to be the play by play announcer for the basketball team introduced the wedding party like he was introducing the starting lineup. After the last duo, I was expecting the lights to come on and the refs to throw up the opening tip.