Here we go . . . again – time for the coaching carousel. I am getting a little tired of this Merry Go Round. I am about ready to jump off but Derek is excited that this could be his year. The only thing that kept him from getting a job was winning and going to the NCAA tournament – at least that is what “they” said. Now, he has helped take a program that hasn’t been to the NCAA tournament in 13 years to the tournament. Everything on his “how to get a job” list had been checked. It was a good year for hiring. There were assistant coaching jobs open at Kansas, Kansas State, Mizzou, Nebraska, and Illinois. Derek did not get one single interview. I literally think I saw his heart break because he had done everything he could do in his power and still could not get a job. And, he did not want to stay in this job another minute. I think his faith was gone. Mine had been gone a long time.
As I have been journaling over the years I often wondered how it was going to end. How would my story of living in the belly of the beast of college basketball end? I, like most people, was hoping for that fairy tale ending – Derek was going to move up the ranks and become a head coach at a small Division I school. He would build up the program and lead it to success, – maybe one of those Cinderella teams in the NCAA tournament, where in, his knowledge and skill would be noticed and he would be hired by a bigger school. This is where he would be the head coach for many years as we raised our family. But, you know what they say, “If you want to make God laugh, make plans!”
As I proofread through my posts during our time in Detroit it is as plain as day to see the ending but when you are living it you don’t see it. Derek was turning into someone I didn’t recognize. And I was drowning as well. This business was destroying our relationship. I knew we were having problems but I felt it was just where we were in life – four young kids involved in activities, a sick dog, an unfulfilling job, a wife who felt unappreciated. I always thought “this too shall pass”. The kids will get older and get driver’s licenses, we will not have to worry about the dog, Derek will eventually get a new job. And one day when are kids are all grown up we would sit on our porch with a glass of tea and reminisce about how hard our time in Detroit was but how we persevered. But, I guess my husband had other ideas and it may not come to any surprise to the reader when I tell you the ending came on October 31, 2012 when my husband told me that he and the athletic director were both asked to resigned because they were caught having an affair. The life of a coach’s wife. . . The end of a coach’s wife. . .